My crazy week is over

Last Sunday, I have made an important decision after 3 phone conversations. Then I spent the whole week running.

Life is unpredictable. 6 months ago, I couldn’t picture about what I am doing today. And today, I cannot imagine what I will be doing 6 months later, either. It seems like everything can change in 6 months.

I’ve just realized that even the closest people in my life cannot help me solve my problems. Parents, best friends, beloved relatives, teachers, acquaintances can give me their advices and guidance; yet they cannot make decisions for me. As I grow older, I understand the sayings of Buddha:

“No one saves us but ourselves

No one can and no one may

We ourselves must walk the path.”

So even if life is a combination of endless struggles, it's ok, keep walking. 

Bad habits need giving up before working full-time

 Graduating college means saying goodbye to terrible exams, crazy dreams, and precious moments. It also means that you are old enough to become a full-time worker. Entering the workforce means that you will have to prepare yourself mentally, emotionally, and physically. One of the things you ought to do is giving up unhealthy habits listed below: 

1. 1.     Drinking alcohol in any weekdays. Drinking wine and beer could lead to unwanted headaches, bad concentration, and reduced productivity. You don’t want that; your customers would not satisfied with that; your boss would definitely doesn’t demand that neither. But, of course, you can have a little fun on Saturday evening.
2. 2.     Getting up late. When you are in college, waking up at 9 am or 11 am is ok. Nobody blames you for not showing up at classes. However, when you are a full-time employee, the only morning you can wake up late is the Saturday/ Sunday morning. And don’t try to be absent from work.
3. 3.     Skipping meal. Instant noodles and junk foods cannot continue being your best friends. Instead, try to replace them with healthy meals. Leave your working table for 45 minutes, if you can, to eat outside. But don’t try going shopping during lunch time!
4. 4.     Skipping exercise. Your body needs stretch to cope with stress. Even when you are really busy, try to exercise 3 times a week. Running could be one of the best choices. It’s cheap, convenient, and undemanding.
5. 5.     Complaining. “My boss is mean,” “Life is not fair, at all,” “That woman is totally a bitch” are some thoughts you would be familiar with. Yes, it would be fine saying those. Nevertheless, complaining about your job and colleagues could not make the works done. Instead, trying to use your energy in developing skills and fulfilling the job could be a better choice.

So far, I have only come up with the list of 5 things you need to give up before entering the workforce. In the future, I will probably come back and update the post.

Taking the first full-time job worries me a lot. There are so many things I need to learn, so many problems to think, so many quarrels to calm down. It feels like I haven’t prepared well enough for the job.

However, when the opportunity comes, it would be stupid if I let it go, wouldn’t it?

Hello May 2013. May the Force be with you and me <3.

Don’t live for anybody else

“I will live for myself, not for anybody else.” That’s what my mother said to me on the telephone this morning. It costs her more than 20 years to realize that simple principle.

Since the day my mother got married, she had been trying her best to become a supporting wife, a loving mother, and a caring daughter-in-law. Bitterly, life never went smooth for her.

• Her only son died of cancer. Her only daughter leaves home for college.
• Her married life is cold and lonely. She never gets along with her in-laws.
• Her biological father died unexpectedly, without giving her a chance to say goodbye.

She cared a little about her career. She never built good habits for her own. For more than 20 years, she lived for people around her. I don’t know whether it is a huge sacrifice or a pure foolishness.

Now when her marriage is on the verge of break-up, I hope that she will get herself a little time to figure out what she truly wants to do.

From my mother's life story, I distill a simple lesson: Don't live for other people. Just don't. Your time is too short. In the blink of an eye, you are on the downside of your life. You don’t want to waste your precious time living the life you’ll regret, do you? 

Women don't know what they want. Men never know what they have. - Ronald Oliver.

(PS: I'm freaking out! I haven't received my Mr.thay's email reply for a couple of days. Oh God, please let him be healthy and well.)

My future plan

I am studying GMAT and learning how to write letters of recommendation (LoRs), admission essays, personal statements, letters of purpose, and so on.

Why?

Because I want to earn a 2-year Master degree in Finance aboard. I am thinking about the United States, Canada, and Europe. I want to leave my country in August 2014.

I used to dream about getting an MBA degree. Dream changed. If I keep staying in Vietnam for 3 or more years, hoping to gain experience for MBA, I will not be able to leave. Other responsibilities and expectations need to be handled. 

Now I want to be trained and taught in a specific area. I choose Finance since I want to work for investment banks or become a reliable financial analyst after graduation.

My GPA is low, my TOEFL score is not too high, my estimated GMAT score will not belong to the top 10%, my working experience is unimpressive. Under those conditions, I am not expecting any merit-based scholarship.

I only pray to find a suitable school that is willing to accept me. US, Canada, Europe (except for England, since they can only provide 1-year Master programs) 

Yet, it is still so hard.  

"Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice. " - Wayne Dyer

Got my TOEFL score today

Waking up, logging in TOEFL website with my eyes half close half open, I couldn’t hold an interjection “Wow”.

I got 27 for Reading, 26 for Listening, 23 for Speaking, and 28 for Writing. My total score is 104.

Couldn’t believe in my eyes, I had been praying for above 90. Thank you, Goddess of Luck.

However, frankly, a little disappointed at my Speaking score. TOEFL examiners commented that I had limited grammar and vocabulary, and that my ideals weren’t adequate developed. (So sad >_<)

I want to contribute my Writing score to Mr.thay’ patience. If I didn’t have him analyzed, marked and guided my writings, I couldn’t write anything at all, put aside TOEFL essays. 28 is not an impressive score. Yet it is the best score I got so far.

In the future, I don’t have to re-take the TOEFL test, phew! Just need to climb the ultimate Everest mountain: GMAT.

*Pray for me, would you? I will need a lot of luck this time.*

Re-learn GMAT

“Study without desire spoils the memory, and it retains nothing that it takes in." – Leonardo da Vinci.

As I mentioned in the previous entry, I’ve already known which kind of career I want to pursue. In my wildest dream, I spend 16 hours per day and 7 days per week in office, collecting, analyzing, and examining data and information. Then, after 2 or 3 years eating and sleeping with work, I can apply for an MBA course.

I don’t know whether I’m lucky or not. It was not until the last semester of college that I've realized what type of career I fit. It seems like I have to start from scratch again. 

In the next 3 months, I’m going to study GMAT.

• First of all, I take the GMAT test for myself. I want to test whether I have potential talents to study and work in financial field or not.

• Second of all, I want to add one plus point in my application. Even if the schools at which I aim don’t require GMAT score, their eyes can sparkle while reading my GMAT report. 

The next 3 months would not be smooth.

I will go through days watching my roommate dress up for work. I will blame myself for not studying GMAT earlier and not performing better in previous job interviews. I will feel inferior standing next to my roommate, shamefully. 

I’ll be scared of getting headache over GMAT problems. I’ll be scared of not getting the score I want.

In the next 3 months, there will be (many) times when I will want to give up. There will be times I will feel like a bunch of useless crap. Under that circumstance, what should I do? 

Today I took the TOEFL iBT test

“Every journey starts with a single step.” I have just taken my first step today: taking the TOEFL iBT test.

I was lucky.3 reading passages were about familiar topics. Listening section was not too hard. 

I’m worrying about the Speaking and Writing section. I made a few small mistakes in 2 essays. I couldn’t convey all of my ideas in 2 speaking questions.

What a relief! My struggling days finally come to an end. I’m waiting for the result. Even when the result is unexpectedly low, I will not feel regretful. 

This week, thanks to Mr.thay’s lecture, I know what career I want to pursue. (Millions thanks to my Mr.thay, as usual.) I’m working to earn an opportunity to become what I want myself to be.

Next step:

• Schools & courses, GMAT, required essays, letters of recommendation, other documents. Retake the TOEFL test, if needed.
• Homework, essays, reading, online courses on finance…..

* Becoming one of “C suite” is tempting. Studying MBA is alluring. I still want to keep my intention to study MBA at Fuqua, Ohlin or Kellogg. But I guess that silly dream can wait a little longer. Maybe 5 years later?*